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Pseudolonewolf`s Avatar Weekly Update Sun 14th Nov 2010 7:29pm

Category: Weekly Updates

Thank you to the few peopel who bought the [MARDEK Piano Collections] thing I released last week. I appreciate it!
Though sales weren't as high as I was hoping, which is why I'm mentioning it here again now.

I've been working for the past month or so on a 'secret game', which I've put as my Current Project under the name 'CBC'; an acronym of the title I won't mention yet.
As you can see, at the time of writing it's 60% complete; I'm making good progress. The actual figure might be higher than that, though.
I've done all the engine stuff, so the game fully works and everything; all that's left is the content. There will be four fairly big 'levels', each with dozens of 'areas' each, and I've finished the first level and started work on the second. If all goes well, each level should take about a week or so, or less if I'm quick, meaning I could have the game out in maybe a month or so? I hope. Yes, hopefully it'll be out for Christmas... Hmm. Bad timing, that, it seems; people won't want to focus on Flash games right after getting better games as presents, maybe.

Anyway, I'm still excited about working on this game and I'll definitely complete it. I want it to be a sort of surprise though, which is why I'm not talking much about it.

Hmm, what else...?
Oh, right. I haven't checked any of my messages since I went away on the trip almost two months ago, so if you've sent me an email or PM during that time and I've seemed to ignore it, that's why.
I've been meaning to get around to them since I got back, but I seem to have developed some fear of checking messages that started when I released MARDEK 3... I got scared back then of finding things from sponsors in my inbox, even though I SHOULD have been eager to check, but then I put off checking for a day, two days, three, a week, two weeks, a months, two months... and it got to the point where I was scared of checking because things would have built up and I might have disappointed people by not replying promptly. So, I thought, not knowing that I HAD disappointed people was better than finding out and feeling horribly bad!!1
Irrational, that, but I was going through a hard time, I suppose, with the release of MARDEK.

Actually, I'm scared of doing the sponsorship stuff for this next game because I feel I embarrassed myself and handled things REALLY badly with MARDEK, and didn't reach its full potential; I never even uploaded it to Newgrounds or anything. Maybe I'll have to do that some time soon.
I never finished the Walkthrough either, though I promised I would, but I don't know if I'm in the right state of mind anymore... Creative people such as myself tend to want to Move On from old projects when they're done...
And I was really terrible when it came to replying to sponsors' emails and so on. I was slow about it, probably said weird things... Maybe they thought I was some kind of *retard* or something?! I don't know, but I worry since I'm not impressed by my performance.
It was perhaps because I'd spent so much time and emotional investment on MARDEK 3, and felt drained and a bit maddened during the difficult sponsorship stuff...

(It was difficult because I'm no good at talking to people of authority; I have this innate 'know your place' mentality, you see, which makes it easy enough to talk to people as the admin here since I 'have authority', but which turns me into a simpering wreck when it comes to talking to someone I regard as higher above me on this subconscious hierarchy, such as the owners of websites, creators of Flash games, etc; I'd never, ever have the confidence to contact other Flash developers like people here can contact me, since I'd feel like a nobody and like I should not be a nuisance to them, or that I wouldn't want to embarrass myself by saying something out of order...)

Uh... Anyway! o_O
THIS turned into something I didn't mean to ramble about! I meant to just give an update about my game-making progress, but, uh... I suppose I'll leave what I wrote as it is for the sake of interest and to make myself cringe or something later. I feel like though I mess things up when it comes to communications, I'd like to explain myself but hmm, don't have the confidence to contact people directly; I'd only be a bother and they've likely forgotten all about it.

Sigh! I'm so mentally stable, me!
Anyway, I'm going to try to get better at communication in general, if I can. I'll try to go through my PMs and emails, so if you get a reply to something you said ages ago to me, that'll be why.
I may also look more into Facebook... That seems like a land of opportunities of various kinds. I'll need to overcome my paralysing fear of seeing photos of online people though. Hmm.


22 Commentson 18 roots

vinnie879`s Avatar
Rating Orb vinnie879 19 Netherlands MelancholicCholeric 79C 0F
7 years ago | (4)
best, christmas game ever:P i hope this is gonna be a fun game
Daorack`s Avatar
Rating Orb Daorack 23 United States 26C 27F
7 years ago | (3)
I know I'm a faceless nobody to you all right now, at this point. However, I think I might have a few suggestions to offer you, pseudo, regarding your problems.

For example, perhaps getting more active in the public chats will help. While you are still nervous there, you seem to be less nervous if it is in public. This may help you ease into it more. I know you already participate in the public portion of the site, I just mean try to gradually increase it. (Within the boundaries of your schedule, of course! I know your busy.)

Anyway, this is just a suggestion that might help. :) I have more if you want it, but I do not wish to come off the wrong way, like some sort of know-it-all. :)
Lyle`s Avatar
Rating Orb Lyle 24 Australia 65C 28F
7 years ago | (5)
There's a very very niche market for Mardek piano songs. Specifically for someone to buy one, they have to be all of the below:

1. A reasonably hardcore fighunter fan (which is a niche group of people who play RPGs + flash games)
2. Like/can play the piano
3. Able to buy stuff online
4. Want to buy it

From my estimates, that would be a very small group of people. That said, congratulations on making and selling the arrangements, it's an accomplishment.
Alphanumerical`s Avatar
Rating Orb Alphanumerical 15 United States SanguineMelancholic 101C 5F
7 years ago | (7)
Hm... it appears I haven't put my two cents in. Oh well, whether you want it or not, here it comes!

Pseudo, I have that 'know your place mentality,' which is why I tend to leave the chat when you're around. Regardless, it is absolutely awful and I know how you feel. Plus, whenever I do ANYTHING even remotely embarrassing in front of someone with authority, it sticks. For years. Seriously, I remember getting in trouble in third grade. And it still bugs me. Anyway, the only way is to try your absolute best to put on a false swagger and realize, "Hey, these guys might possibly respect that. Maybe." Plus, it helps to realize that, yeah, you will fail. A lot. But, it still doesn't matter, because... Why does it matter? Hm... I seem to have forgotten. Or, I never had it. Regardless, you have to learn that they're probably just the same as you, just with a slight edge over you. Hm... I'm not helping much, am I? Hm... I can't seem to help you at all... Oh well. It's not that bad. You'll probably end up helping yourself, anyway, so it really doesn't matter. Or never getting over it. Well, anyway, I suppose that concludes this uh... thing. Yes, we'll go with that. This thing. So, I guess I'm done rambling. If anybody can actually follow that, let me know. I want to know what you get out of that! By get out of that, I mean what message comes across.
karthetoast`s Avatar
Rating Orb karthetoast 14 Canada MelancholicPhlegmatic 9C 0F
7 years ago | (3)
Well if someones correct on the name of the "Secret Game" I hope they keep the idea to themselves or it would ruin the fun of it being "secret" 8P
makemardek4`s Avatar
Rating Orb makemardek4 21 United States MelancholicSanguine 6C 0F
7 years ago | (9)
CBC is the subtitle for Mardek 4, or at least that's what I'm apparently hoping for
myperson54`s Avatar
Rating Orb myperson54 14 Canada CholericSanguine 59C 11F
7 years ago | (13)
I have an idea about what CBC is! Pseudo if fooling with us; CBC stands for Chimaera:Beast Creator, or some variation of that. CBC is really just Chimaera in disguise!
myperson54`s Avatar
Rating Orb myperson54 14 Canada CholericSanguine 59C 11F
7 years ago | (6)
Just wondering; Why are people rating me badly on my posts? Are trolls rating everyone yellow or lower? And it's not just this one, almost All my posts are yellow!
turbotowns`s Avatar
Rating Orb turbotowns 16 United States CholericPhlegmatic 216C 3F
7 years ago | (10)
I would'nt i would be playing Halo: Reach, but i still save time for computer. :)
Duogduogduog`s Avatar
Rating Orb Duogduogduog 16 United States MelancholicPhlegmatic 62C 12F
7 years ago | (7)
I have fears of knivies and stuff yet i hold a sword in my room which is now that real but you see... i hate seeing blood sometimes and it sometimes makes me scared, Alot of people don't like showing themselves to facebook so that's why they keep their profile private. I just put my art on facebook and i do have a webcam but i don't like showing my face as well in some parts of facebook...

When i touch a knife i feel like cutting a person in half and i usausllay think about people i hate and I'm a person who hates fighting, But i can understand you and facebook comparing me and knives and tons of other stuff but I'm not that scared of the dark.... I've going outside abit late and it calms me down and sometimes i think about things that has happened when i'm outside.
I don't go outside at daytime since it annoys me, I hate that bright sunlight...

Clouter`s Avatar
Rating Orb Clouter 16 Brazil CholericSanguine 15C 8F
7 years ago | (3)
Pseudo, if you're not willing to finish the walkthrough, why don't you ask someone else to do it for you? I'm an old member and I know there are several people you trust in this site that would happily do it for you. Besides, most of the info needed for it can be found on the wiki or in Remember, you don't have to do it all alone (although I know you prefer to do it alone).
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