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Comment History218 in total

This shows all comments by the user Rating Orb Brock:
Userpage: Rating Orb E CtG  
Brock`s Avatar
Rating Orb Brock 17 United States MelancholicPhlegmatic 218C 78F
2 years ago | (0)
Please enlighten us, if you even remember it. :O
Otherwise, thanks for the status update either way! :D
Userpage: Rating Orb E CtG  
Brock`s Avatar
Rating Orb Brock 17 United States MelancholicPhlegmatic 218C 78F
2 years ago | (0)
This seems like a great idea! I never really had the courage to even consider doing things like that, and you definatly have the charisma and spunk to do so, Ctree! Also, I miss you on fig. I know you probably won't be coming back, but I still miss you, and I'd like to talk to you at length sometime! :D

Uh... yeah. That's all I have to say. I might even make a top 10 villain list of all time and post it on my own bio to see how it goes!
Userpage: Rating Orb Michos  
Brock`s Avatar
Rating Orb Brock 17 United States MelancholicPhlegmatic 218C 78F
3 years ago | (1)
I'm really looking forward to your game. Keep it up, Michos, and the rest of us will try our best in whatever we do too... yes.
Userpage: Rating Orb Ooneykcall  
Brock`s Avatar
Rating Orb Brock 17 United States MelancholicPhlegmatic 218C 78F
3 years ago | (1)
I'm glad some people have the same expressed opinion about me on the necessity of using tsunami on a Fungoblin and flame soul! :D

Anyway, yeah, the announcement seemed a little unnecessary and slightly odd. Not that I was necessarily for or against the whole thing, but I just with the infraction system was improved and you had gotten a chance to defend yourselves. Just thinking about how toxic the chat is hurts my head. I just wish that people weren't saying it was the 'end of fig'. That's a bunch of bull smeg.

Now, if only Pseudo would hear you out, things may have gone better...
Userpage: Rating Orb david s  
Brock`s Avatar
Rating Orb Brock 17 United States MelancholicPhlegmatic 218C 78F
6 years ago | (1)
I actually made up pugspugs90, to tell you the truth, so don't worry about him... or her or whatever. I feel bad that the site has sort of wavered, so I've been trying to convince some people on the new site to go back to the old site and introduce themselves to the community, so they can make the transition between the two sites easier. On the old site, my 'breath of life' thread didn't bring much to life except introductions of a few members I already knew. I was hoping the thread could be more of a one way between both sites, but due to my small popularity and tiny voice in the crowd, it was not to be so.

Userpage: Rating Orb david s  
Brock`s Avatar
Rating Orb Brock 17 United States MelancholicPhlegmatic 218C 78F
6 years ago | (2)
Hey david s, hope you're doing okay, but I would like to know what happened to pugspugs90. He just sort of disappeared into pugdom, and I was hoping you could help me search for him in the "search for pugspugs90" expedition. Just a thought...
Userpage: Rating Orb SilverShoelaces  
Brock`s Avatar
Rating Orb Brock 17 United States MelancholicPhlegmatic 218C 78F
6 years ago | (1)
Hello SilverShoelaces and, ermm, happy late welcome to fighunter! You seem to have gotten off to a great start! I have been trying to keep this site alive before we transit to the new site, and it would be very welcoming if you would post in the "We need a breath of life..." thread so people can get to know you better when they transist from the new to old site. I havent gotten any "newer" members to post there yet, and was hoping you could voice yourself out to the community. I (used) to be fairly well known on this site, but my notice from members has sort of dwindled since my past few visits here. I am attempting to revitalize the chatroom and this site so the older more prominent members can recognize you and between the transition between sites. I know I sound like a bleeding advertiser right now, but it would be great if you could help with this so members will feel more comfortable with the transition.
Userpage: Rating Orb Brock  
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Rating Orb Brock 17 United States MelancholicPhlegmatic 218C 78F
6 years ago | (0)
The next couple of pages in my story. I hope you enjoy reading them:

Yet the best thing to do now seemed to be to find shelter. It appeared as if the branding circle was gone, and I felt something soft underfoot. I picked up the substance and let it sift through my hands. Sand. It appeared as if I was at a coastline of some sort, most likely close to the town of Radshire.
A sudden yell pierced my ears, as a guardsman strolled up to me, a rifle in his hands, dragging an unconsious criminal over his shoulder, who had the same mark on his chest as me. Once he reached the bank I was on, he passed me, continuing to walk until he had reached the shoreline.
Curious, I turned to watch the scene unfold.
Carefully, the guardsman tied up the criminal with a rope, like you would tie up a mummy, only with much less wrapping. He then proceeded to take three separate ropes from his belt, and placed the man almost into the ocean, where the waves touched the sand. He tied the three ropes to different parts of the main rope, and set them up in the direction south of where the tied up criminal was. He staked all three ropes down as you would a tent, and then walked away.
Still clueless, I watched as the waves splashed over the unconsious man, then receded, splashed over him and receded. After this had gone on for two or three minutes, the guardsman returned, along with another person. A lady stepped over to the criminal and pressed her hands against her temples.
As if by magic, the criminal awoke, gasping and sputtering from all the water that had accumulated in his mouth (his head wasn’t tied up, thankfully). The lady looked at the guardsman and he nodded. She then nodded back, and returned back to wherever she had come from.
The guardsman, stared at the tied up criminal and spoke brashly. It took me only a few seconds to notice this must have been a primitive way of torturing someone. The tide washed constantly up to shore, and then receded, making whoever tied up slowly begin to lose breath, and eventually die if they did nothing. The three ropes that bound the man to the ground looked tight, despite the water washing over them constantly. He could not move or crawl forward, and moving backwards would just end up speeding up the possibility of his death.
The guardsman began to interrogate the man, asking him questions in some foreign language I couldn’t understand. Apparently, the criminal didn’t understand him either, probably because he could not hear the questions clearly due to the water washing up to his face, or because he was from a different country. Either way, it was horrid to watch, as the guard started kicking the man in the face and shoulders.
I had to get out of here quick. These people in the town of Radshire were starting to creep me out already.
As I began running however, I noticed the criminal scream for help. Apparently he spoke my native tongue. It took me a few seconds to notice he was calling me for help.
Unfortunately, I was unarmed, and I didn’t stand a chance against an armored guard. The land around me was still sandy, and there appeared to be nothing on the ground to use as a suitable weapon.
With no other options, I left the man to die amidst the waters of Radshire’s coastline.
Userpage: Rating Orb Brock  
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Rating Orb Brock 17 United States MelancholicPhlegmatic 218C 78F
6 years ago | (0)
Alright I'll fix it up, and yes, the crunch bar was a joke, I was going to change that later. The reason I changed from first to third person is that the person in the first two paragraphs is the narrator, sort of, describing who he is and what he is planning on doing (and is to remain anonymous at the time). Later when I change to third person, I have the narrator (who is not the main character, but is a companion of his later on [not Cavar]) speaking of a character in the past. Figured out who it is yet? Probably not.

Since I am a novice writer, I expected your post to be long. The branding circle is a teleportation circle that teleports you somewhere and brands a mark on your chest, signifying to the non-magic users that you are an exile. People in towns near Radshire use this mark to show who they have exiled, and send them off somewhere, usually to Radshire. The mages in Benerai used this mark to make him look like he was a refugee cast out for doing "bad things". The POP! was meant to be a whole bunch of periods that showed the seperation between the two point-of-views. I, of course, put it in the wrong spot. It was nothing more than that. I wrote the prologue rather badly, and I didn't put enough detail into it. The fact that you thought the branding circle was a courtyard was not unusual at all. I described it terribly. However, really, the narrator is trapped in the branding circle (because of magic) and cannot move. He is in more of a punishment chamber than a courtroom, though it's not neccessarily at torture room as it is more of a warning room, like saying 'this is your last chance'.

The very first sentence was rather just thrown in there to sound cool. However it does have significance which is explained later on. The prologue character is not the main villian, nor is he a good guy. He's not that important of a character really. Originally, he was to be the main vilian in the story, but he just seemed... too nice to be the main villian. I didn't describe the room, you have a good point there, and I also didn't set the scene well enough. I will fix that if I can, if not extend the two paragraphs a lot.

OH NO!!! I USED YOU!!!! No, I don't mean using you like a tool, but I used the word 'you'. I will fix that if I remember to. I should probably copy and paste your post. Yep. Anyway, I didn't describe the cellar much because I don't know much about them. I know they are usually dark and scary, but I should probably say something like 'storage room' instead, as it fits the short description of the 'cellar' better. You probably noticed the dirt in the face thing. I forgot to take that out, I was rather just writing without checking for errors, which is not the best way to write a book. The two characters that walk down the stairs are foot solidiers for the Black Elite, which you probably figured out. I didn't describe them much because Deravane wasn't really getting a good view of them, but he could tell they were knights or spies of some sort. I didn't pull that off well did I?

As you said, I should probably fix the whole chocolate bar thing. It doesn't make much sense, and wouldn't the knights notice the pile of trash and food that went up to the ceiling? I mean honestly! I really need to re-read my work and change it a bit. If you have anything to say after this, please incline. You said you have more to say, so say it! Don't leave me on a cliffhanger, waiting for what you had to say!

But, alas, I need to go fix my story so.... I'll see you in a bit... I think.
Userpage: Rating Orb Brock  
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Rating Orb Brock 17 United States MelancholicPhlegmatic 218C 78F
6 years ago | (0)
Please critic and rate this however you want to. I would love to hear some feedback from this, and though I am not the best writer (as you can see), I'm finally starting to make some progress!
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